Bill's Choice

[AMD-USR_JL]

I heard this a long time ago, it was very funny. I hope i can remember it right, cause i am sure you guys will get a kick out of it too. * I added some stuff too.

Well, Bill Gates dies, but instead of going straight to heaven or hell God meets him inbetween.
God says: "Bill, you have done great things like bringing your OS to nearly everyone, but you have also done some terrible things like Windows 95. So i have decided to give you a choice between heaven and hell."

So God takes Bill down to hell. Bill is astounded by everything he sees there. It's a tropical paradise, with every food imaginable, and Bill's wildest dream of 20 hot, sexy, babes is there too. As an added bonus God gave him an endless tap of the best tasting beer ever created.

Without God even taking Bill to heaven he says "This is perfect, i don't think Heaven could be any better than this." A floating keyboard and monitor appear before Bill's eyes. On the screen it says "Do you choose Hell? Y/N" Bill types a confident Y. "Are you sure? Y/N." Without hesitating he presses Y.

Bill is violently thrown into a spiral and is sent flying to Hell. When he regains his consciousness, he opens his eyes ready to enjoy his new paradise. Instead he is in a world of fire and brimstone, and nauseating abominations of dilapidated creatures. "God, God!" God appears "What is the matter my child?" asks God "Where are all the beautiful things you had shown before, this is not what i wanted." says Bill.

God replies with a smirk " Oh, i'm sorry Bill. What you saw before was just Hell's Screensaver."

[NeoGen]

Poor Bill... :lol:

I've heard a similar one many years ago, but it was something like... Bill had gone to hell, and Lucifer gave him a tour of the place, and even showed that they had computers down there. Bill was pleased, thinking that he would be entertained and hell wasn't so bad after all.
But when he got closer to the computers, he noticed they were all Macintosh's :lol:

[gamer007]

Since we are talking about Bill Gates here, here's another one. :)

Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever.

Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured.
He then takes him to a massive coliseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions.
Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a bottle of the finest wine sitting on a table. To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says "I'll take this option."

"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan locks the room after Bill.

As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer. "That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best place of all!"

"That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan.

"The bottle has a hole in it!"

"What about the PC?"

"It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan.

"And it's missing three keys,"

"Which three?"

"Control, Alt and Delete."