A man was walking down the street when he was
accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him
for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars
and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it
instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless
man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying
food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man
said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course
instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't
played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red
light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?"
exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the
money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked
by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be
furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell
pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for
her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing,
golf, and sex."